"What was the first cultural difference you felt in America?"
At a university taking classes in the United States, I participated in a program where college students from the same school and international students had a conversation. At the time, I replied to that friend, "I have to say hello to everyone I meet on the street." Americans make eye contact with people walking from opposite sides and greet each other, which couldn't be so awkward at first. If you say hello first, of course, you will say hello together, but in fact, it was not easy to make eye contact and timing when to say hello because I had never done it before in Korea. Was it that hard to say "Hi". However, I used to think about how loud my voice should be, and whether I should even raise my hand and shake it, even briefly.
On the contrary, an American college student who heard my answer said, "I can't even imagine not saying hello on the street." It is difficult to accept that there is a culture that does not greet people who have always made eye contact with them on the street since they were young, regardless of whether they are children or adults. This friend said, "I think I would be very embarrassed if I was walking down the street and no one looked at me, didn't accept me even if I said hello, or didn't say hello to me first. I think I might have done something wrong, or do all these people hate me?" he said.
This cultural difference, which baffled me, was naturally overcome over time. Now I used to feel awkward when I was rushing by, or when there were people who passed without saying hello because they were foreigners like me. In fact, even though I went through the "adaptation period" in the beginning, I felt embarrassed and happy after being greeted by the other person with a smile first. Making eye contact with strangers and artificially smiling to greet them eased my mood and mind a lot.
The reason why the U.S., which has a strong individualistic tendency, is generous to personnel was because people from various cultures needed an open attitude to live together in the early days of the founding of the country, when immigrants settled. It is because showing basic trust and kindness, even if you don't know each other, was a way to maintain peace in the community. There was also an interpretation that since individualism is strong, this tendency is not seen as indifference or coolness, so that it greets neighbors as part of a signal that "I am not your enemy."
Apart from the historical and cultural background, the background that the personnel culture of the United States has impressed me even more is because of changes in my family. I grew up listening to the old adults saying, "Blessing comes naturally even if you say hello well," but in fact, it was not easy for me to greet even someone I knew first in Korea. Like me (mother), who was very shy when I was young, the children couldn't greet the adults loudly and hid behind them, so they were nagged by the grandmothers quite a bit. However, thanks to the culture of the United States, where everyone greets, the children, who remained expressionless despite scolding and nagging, began to say hello like ants to the sound of "Hi" all day long.
Small Talk, which asks for simple greetings and greetings when staying in the same space for a while, ignited the children's change. After a neighbor's grandfather, who found my family while taking a dog walk, asked the children how they were doing first, they walked around the neighborhood to meet the grandfather and the dog and say hello. When I didn't see him for a few days, I used to wonder, 'How are Grandpa XX and his dog?' Children, who often avoided strangers at the playground, began to play with strangers without hesitation after being trained by the constant greetings and safety of neighbors.
Looking at the children who naturally greet their neighbors without teaching them to say hello when they see adults, I envied the greeting culture that has already become a daily routine here. It was a short American life, but I think that if I go back to Korea, the original culture that passes without greetings may become embarrassing for the time being. Although one person may not be able to change the culture, knowing the "taste of greetings," I make a pledge to make eye contact with people around me a little more often and say hello more often.